I think I'm bisexual but I'm scared to tell my homophobic dad

DEAR DEIDRE: A GIRL forced me to do sexual things with her and I have had a fear of getting close to females ever since.

I am a 23-year-old man and I think I’m bisexual. I want to tell my family how I feel but my dad is very anti-gay and I still live at home.


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There were gay feelings before I dated this girl a couple of years ago.

She insisted on me touching her sexually and I was traumatised.

It keeps coming back to me. I couldn’t possibly think of a sexual relationship with a female, though a platonic friendship would be fine.

I was called gay at school and had a lot of abuse and trouble from gangs which makes it harder to come out.

DEIDRE SAYS: If you do not want to have a sexual relationship with a woman, but have sexual feelings for men, then you are gay. But I can see how a homophobic father and school bullies make it difficult.

Your sexuality isn’t a choice. Some parents are more understanding than their gay children expect.

First find support to help you feel confident, then decide if you need to come out to family. My e-leaflet on Gay Resources will help.

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