Carlos Brathwaite left frustrated by umpiring decisions in defeat by Australia

Carlos Brathwaite expressed his frustration with the umpiring during the West Indies’ loss to Australia at Trent Bridge on Thursday.

Chris Gayle and Jason Holder were both given out twice on the field before being reprieved by DRS while the ball from Mitchell Starc before Gayle was eventually dismissed should have been called for a front foot no ball – thus giving the West Indies batsman a free hit.

And Brathwaite felt those decisions cost his side the opportunity to earn a second win in the tournament.


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“I don’t know if I’ll be fined for saying it but I just think that the umpiring was a bit frustrating,” he said. “Even when we were bowling we thought a few balls close to head height were called wides.

“And obviously three decisions…as far as I can remember being dodgy, it was frustrating and sent ripples through the dressing room.

“To lose Chris in a chase of 280, who can probably get 180 of them himself obviously, broke the start that we wanted to have.

“But the umpires do their job, they try to do it to the best of their ability, we as players go out there to do our job as well, so there was no confrontation between the players and the umpires.

“I just think I’d like that for West Indies, we don’t have to use all our reviews and that some of the other teams get a chance to use theirs because, every time we get hit on our pad, the finger goes up.

“When we hit the opposition on their pad, the finger stays down. So we have to use our reviews and it’s always missing and then we have to use our reviews when we’re batting as well and it’s always clipping.

“I’m not a technology person, I don’t know why that happens, I can just say what I have seen happen over the past few years.”

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20 ‘Big Little Lies’ Season 1 Instagram Captions To Carry You Through Season 2

It’s almost time for the Monterey 5 make their comeback. Season 2 of Big Little Lies is almost here, after a long two-year break since the first season. Las time fans saw the moms of Monterey, they had bonded after a serious tragedy brought them closer together. But it likely won’t be smooth sailing in Season 2. There are plenty of lies and secrets still brewing under the surface that are almost definitely going to bubble over soon. And when they do, fans will be there so soak it all in. If you’re posting on social media while watching, you’ll need a killer caption. Luckily for you, here are 15 Big Little Lies Season 1 Instagram captions that are sure to capture all the brilliance of the moms of Monterey.

1. "I love my grudges. I tend to them like little pets." – Madeline

2. "This is Monterey. We pound people with nice." – Madeline

3. “Sometimes I’m just holding onto this idea of perfection so tight, something has to give.” – Madeline

4. Jane: They’re kids, though, you know. They bully. It’s human nature. They grow out of it.Celeste: Sometimes they don’t.

5. "Men can be a little more intuitive than we give them credit for." – Celeste

6. “Renata, Jane is not a nanny. She’s just young … like you used to be.” – Madeline

7. "Nobody knows nothing about anybody. You can write that down." – member of the Greek chorus

8. "Sweetheart, everyone around here just assumes I’m the root cause of everything. Don’t worry." – Madeline

9. "There is something to be said for being there, for being truthful, for being somebody you can steadfastly count on. I will not be anybody’s runner up." – Ed

10. "You know it’s okay for things to be ugly sometimes." – Nathan

11. "Bring me something chocolate that won’t make my *ss look fat." – Madeline

12. "Scratch the surface of any Jimmy Stewart? Charlie Manson." – member of the Greek chorus

13. "I’m trying to decide if I’m happy or sad." – Celeste

14. "Come meet my knight in shining armor. She rescued me like a wounded dog in the street." – Madeline

15. "For six years, I’ve been wiping runny noses, organizing play dates, doing everything to be a good mom. Today I felt alive. I felt good. I feel so ashamed for saying this, but being a mother is not enough for me. It’s just not. It’s not even close." – Celeste

16. "I want more." – Madeline

17. "I am a lady and I’ve never said this to anybody in my entire life bit I’m gonna say it to you: You can go f*ck yourself on the head." – Madeline

18. "None of us really see things as they are, we see things as we are." – Bonnie

19. "If I catch you driving and texting again I will find your mother and I will throw this at her." – Madeline

20. "You’re dead in this town." – Renata

Big Little Lies Season 2 premieres on Sunday, June 9 at 9 P.M. ET on HBO.

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27 Racehorses Have Died at This Track Since Dec. 26

At Santa Anita Park in Southern California on Wednesday, a 2-year-old colt named Derby River was injured while galloping during training and had to be euthanized, making him the 27th fatality at the racetrack since the start of its current meet on Dec. 26.

The deaths have commanded the public’s attention during a contentious Triple Crown season and have threatened to close down the sport in California.

The turn of events has put pressure on the Stronach Group — which owns the track and several others, including Pimlico Race Course in Baltimore — and the sport at large to put meaningful reforms in place to ensure safety of its equine athletes and the jockeys who ride them.

Dead horses, too many of them, have drawn a bull’s-eye around the sport.

Nearly 10 horses a week, on average, died at American racetracks in 2018, according to the Jockey Club’s Equine Injury Database. That fatality rate is two and a half to five times greater than in the rest of the horse racing world.

The sport is divided. On one side are horse breeders and owners who back a federal bill to create a uniform national standard for drug testing and medication rules in racehorses that would be overseen by the United States Anti-Doping Agency. On the other are horse trainers and racetrack owners who find the proposed changes too expensive and intrusive.

In March, after the 22nd fatality at Santa Anita, the Stronach Group announced a ban on the use of whips and medication on racing days. It was applauded by animal rights activists but angered horsemen in California and beyond.

The Triple Crown got off to a raucous start after a multimillion-dollar disqualification in the Kentucky Derby confused and then angered some casual sports fans who tune in to horse racing for five weeks in the spring.

Then the day before Pimlico hosted the 144th running of the Preakness Stakes, the second race of the Triple Crown, a 3-year-old filly named Congrats Gal died soon after pulling up and finishing last in the Miss Preakness Stakes there.

On the day of the Preakness, Tim Ritvo, chief operating officer of the Stronach Group, acknowledged the stakes were high, especially in California, where it would take just 600,000 signatures in a state of more than 39 million to get a ballot initiative before the voters to decide if the sport should be banned.

“We were really devastated and close to seeing racing go away,” Ritvo said of the California fatalities.

Here is a list of the horses that have died at Santa Anita. The New York Times will continue to update it.`

June 5

Derby River, an unraced 2-year-old colt, sustained a catastrophic shoulder injury while training and had to be euthanized at a nearby clinic. Mike Marten, a spokesman for the California Horse Racing Board, said that a necropsy would be performed and that the death would be included on the Santa Anita list even though Derby River had died at the clinic.

May 26

Kochees, a 9-year-old gelding, sustained an injury in a $10,000 claimer, one of the racetrack’s lowest levels, on May 25 and was taken off the track by van. He was euthanized the next day. He was trained and partly owned by Jerry Hollendorfer, a Hall of Famer. After being sold at a 2-year-old auction for $120,000 in 2012, Kochees was in 49 races, winning 11 times and earning more than $245,000 in purses.

May 20

Spectacular Music, ridden by Jorge Velez, pulled up in the backstretch after leaving the gate in a $25,000 claiming race on May 19. He was taken away with an apparent pelvis injury, and euthanized the next morning.

May 17

Commander Coil, a 3-year-old gelding, was euthanized after sustaining a shoulder injury while training. He was trained by Marcelo Polanco.

March 31

Arms Runner, a 5-year-old gelding, fell in a race, sustaining a catastrophic injury to his right front leg that led him to be euthanized. He was trained by Peter Miller and was sold at a 2-year-old in training sale for $525.000. Two days before Arms Runner was fatally injured, the track had reopened after a nearly monthlong shutdown in response to the equine deaths.

March 14

Princess Lili B broke her front legs while training. Trained by David Bernstein, she was a 3-year-old filly. She was not bought at auction.

March 5

Let’s Light the Way died during a morning workout. The 4-year-old filly won once in four races for the Hall of Fame trainer Ron McAnally. She was bought for $15,000 as a yearling.

March 2

Eskenforadrink died during a $16,000 claiming race of one mile. The 4-year-old filly had won two of her 12 lifetime races for the trainer Jorge Gutierrez. She was bought for $15,000 in 2016.

Feb. 25

Charmer John died after a timed workout on the main track. The 3-year-old gelding had run only once for the trainer Mark Glatt. Charmer John was bought for $36,000.

Feb. 23

Battle of Midway died after a timed workout. In 2017, he was third in the Kentucky Derby and won the Breeders’ Cup Dirt Mile. He had been retired as a stallion but was ineffective getting mares pregnant. Battle of Midway returned to the racetrack and, three weeks earlier, had won the San Pasqual Stakes at Santa Anita. He was bought for $410,000 as a yearling and was trained by Hollendorfer.

Just Forget It died the same day after a timed workout. The 4-year-old gelding was trained by Librado Barocio.

Feb. 22

Hot American died after running in a $25,000 waiver claiming race on the turf. The 4-year-old gelding was 1 for 10 lifetime. He was trained by Ryan Hanson.

Feb. 18

Unusual Rider died after a timed workout on the main track. The 3-year-old gelding was 0 for 4 for the trainer Mike Puype.

Feb. 17

Jager Time died after running a four-furlong timed workout on the main track. The 4-year-old colt was unraced and was trained by Jorge Periban.

Feb. 6

Comegowithme died after running in a five-and-a-half furlong $50,000 maiden claiming race. The 3-year-old filly was 0 for 5 lifetime and was originally bought for $1,200. She was trained by Antonio Garcia.

Feb. 2

Kid Cantina died after the Grade 3 $150,000 Robert Lewis Stakes, a prep race for the Kentucky Derby. He was a $15,000 purchase as a yearling and was trained by Barocio.

Jan. 25

Spitfire died after a timed workout on the main track. The 7-year-old gelding won three of his 13 lifetime races. He cost $100,000 as a yearling and was trained by Brian Koriner, who trained last year’s California horse of the year, Spiced Perfection.

Jan. 23

Dancing Harbor died during a timed workout. The 4-year-old gelding won once in eight races and was trained by Frank Lucarelli.

Jan. 21

Last Promise Kept died after running in the Grade 3 $100,000 Megahertz Stakes, a mile race on the turf. The 5-year-old mare won three of her 12 lifetime races. She was trained by Tom Proctor.

Like Really Smart died after running in a $50,000 maiden claiming race over six and a half furlongs. The 5-year-old gelding was bought as a yearling for $5,000. He was trained by Leonard Powell.

Jan. 20

Amboseli died after running in the Grade 3 $100,000 Astra Stakes, a one-and-a-half-mile turf race. The 7-year-old mare won two of 26 lifetime starts and was trained by Jim Cassidy, president of the California Thoroughbred Trainers.

Jan. 18

Noise Mandate died after finishing last in her debut race, a five-and-a-half-furlong $20,000 maiden claiming race. The 3-year-old filly’s trainer was Michael Machowsky.

Jan. 11

Derby Treasure died in a six-furlong $30,000 maiden claiming race. The 4-year-old filly had no wins in eight tries. She was bought as a 2-year-old for $3,500 and trained by Ruben Gomez.

Jan. 8

Secret Street died during a five-furlong timed workout. He was an unraced 3-year-old trained by Bruce Headley.

Jan. 4

Tank Team died during a race for 3-year-old maidens going six and a half furlongs on the downhill turf course. It was the third career race for the gelding. He was trained by Keith Desormeaux, who won the 2016 Preakness Stakes with Exaggerator.

Unusual Angel died in the same race as Tank Team. It was the colt’s fourth career race. He was trained by Alexis Barber.

Dec. 30

Psychedelicat died during a $16,000 claiming race that was a mile on the dirt. He won twice in 18 career starts. He cost $90,000 as a yearling and was the first of three horses trained by Hollendorfer to die.

Joe Drape has been writing about the intersection of sports, culture and money since coming to The Times in 1998. He has also pursued these lines of reporting as the author of two best-selling books. @joedrape

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Zion Williamson Invited to U.S.A. Basketball Training Camp

Zion Williamson of Duke University has been invited to U.S.A. Basketball’s August training camp in Las Vegas as part of a 10-man “select” team of up-and-coming players, according to the U.S.A.B. chairman, Jerry Colangelo.

Colangelo said in a phone interview that Williamson — the presumptive No. 1 overall pick in the June 20 N.B.A. draft — could still play his way onto the senior 12-man roster for the FIBA World Cup in China (Aug. 31-Sept. 15) if his performance with the select squad merits it.

“We want to indoctrinate him in terms of U.S.A. Basketball,” Colangelo said. “We want to give him a platform to see how he can compete with some of the vets that are going to be there.”

As Colangelo noted, Anthony Davis of the New Orleans Pelicans went from the select team to the full 12-man roster for the London Olympics in 2012 despite never having played a game in the N.B.A.

New Orleans holds the top selection in the June draft and is widely expected to select Williamson. The team’s new lead voice in the front office, David Griffin, is also trying to persuade Davis to rescind the trade request he lodged with the Pelicans in January under a previous regime.

As reported last week, Davis, Houston’s James Harden, Utah’s Donovan Mitchell and Charlotte’s Kemba Walker have committed to the senior national team that will represent the United States in China in the 32-team World Cup. It will be the first competition in which Coach Gregg Popovich of the San Antonio Spurs will lead the team, having been chosen as the successor to Duke’s Mike Krzyzewski.

Colangelo said that U.S.A. Basketball plans to bring 18 established N.B.A. players, as well as the 10-player select squad, to the training camp that starts Aug. 5 in Las Vegas.

Before the team leaves the county in mid-August, Colangelo, Popovich and the U.S.A.B. men’s national director, Sean Ford, will have to pare the 18 invitees down to a 12-man roster for China — with Williamson and the other members of the select squad unofficially vying for spots as well.

Colangelo said the full 18-man roster for training camp wouldn’t be official until next week, but ESPN has reported several names in addition to those of Davis, Harden, Mitchell and Walker.

They are: San Antonio’s LaMarcus Aldridge, Sacramento’s Harrison Barnes, Washington’s Bradley Beal, Detroit’s Andre Drummond, Houston’s Eric Gordon and P.J. Tucker, Portland’s Damian Lillard and C.J. McCollum, Milwaukee’s Brook Lopez and Khris Middleton, Cleveland’s Kevin Love, Boston’s Jayson Tatum and Kyle Kuzma of the Los Angeles Lakers.

Because of a format change, U.S.A. Basketball had to qualify for the World Cup with a roster of players mostly from the N.B.A. G League who were led by the ESPN broadcaster Jeff Van Gundy as a stand-in coach for Popovich.

After its last World Cup, in Spain in 2014, FIBA reverted to a World Cup soccer-style qualifying format in which several qualifying windows overlapped with the past two N.B.A. regular seasons.

Unlike in world soccer, which utilizes international breaks worldwide to allow players to leave their clubs and return to their various national teams, N.B.A. players were not allowed to participate in World Cup qualifying while in season.

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Chris Evans: Virgin Radio host asks Harry Redknapp for marriage advice

Chris quizzed the football manager after he revealed how he met his wife, Sandra. The 53-year-old found out Harry and Sandra have been married for 51 years and together for 55. He went on ask for any tips on marriage.

Speaking on his Virgin Radio Breakfast Show, Chris said: “Any tips for the rest of us to do with marriage?”

“Come on, tell us.”

Harry responded: “I don’t know with my missus she’s my life.

“I got to be honest, she’s a different class.”

Harry wasn’t able to reveal his secret to a happy marriage but did tell Chris how he met Sandra.

Harry said: “As a young footballer at West Ham about 17, me and a mate of mine decided to go to a dance at the two puddings pub in Stratford.

“It was all Motown music at the time in the 60s.

“And there was Sandra and her mate.

“Me and my pal, who was a goalkeeper at West Ham, decided to go have a dance with these two good-looking girls across the dance floor.

“Obviously my mate was better looking than me so when we walked over the pair of them probably thought ‘well, I hope I haven’t got him’.

“But Sandra ended up with me unfortunately for her.

“As it turned out, my mate the goalkeeper ended up being an undertaker so she had a result in the end.”

Chris laughed and asked Harry how long the pair have been together.

Harry said: “We have been married 51 years this year.

“We were going out for four years before that.”

Chris Evans Virgin Radio Breakfast Show airs weekdays at 6.30am.

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New $4,500 fine issued in connection with Jeff Callaway’s UCP leadership bid

As investigations continue into allegations of wrongdoing in the 2017 United Conservative Party leadership race, as well as Jeff Callaway’s leadership bid in particular, Alberta’s election commissioner has levied yet another fine.

Earlier this week, Christopher Maitland was issued a $4,500 fine after the commissioner found he violated the Election Finances and Contributions Disclosure Act by contributing $3,000 to Callaway’s campaign “with funds given or furnished by another person.”

The fine was levied on June 3.

Callaway’s campaign has been under close scrutiny because of allegations his bid was a “kamikaze campaign” intended to go after Jason Kenney’s primary rival, Brian Jean. Callaway eventually dropped out of the race and threw his support behind Kenney, who emerged victorious in the contest and has since become premier.

Emails obtained by Global News earlier this year show ongoing communication between the Kenney and Callaway campaigns throughout much of the race. They suggest Kenney staffers provided strategic direction, attack ads, speaking notes, speeches and media support to the Callaway campaign.

“There was staff communicating on communications material and stuff like that,” Kenney told Global News Radio in March, while speaking about his campaign staff’s dealings with members of Callaway’s leadership campaign. “This is not the least bit unusual that campaigns will communicate.”

Kenney has also vehemently denied that he helped to finance Callaway’s campaign in any way.

Meanwhile, an RCMP investigation into allegations of voter fraud in the 2017 leadership race is ongoing. Late last month, the Alberta Crown Prosecution Service announced it is seeking a prosecutor to help advise police as they look into the campaign.

Watch below: (From May 30, 2019) Alberta is seeking a special outside prosecutor to assist the RCMP as they look into whether fraud was committed in the UCP leadership race won by Jason Kenney.


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Netherlands 3-1 England: Gareth Southgate will not abandon style despite errors

England boss Gareth Southgate says he will not abandon his playing principles despite the errors that cost his side a place in the Nations League final.

Mistakes by John Stones and Ross Barkley led to two extra-time goals for the Netherlands after the sides drew 1-1 in normal time.

But Southgate was adamant his side are capable of playing possession football.

“I’m asking them to play a tough game at the back – if we didn’t play that way we wouldn’t be here,” he said.

“We didn’t lose because of how we wanted to play; we lost because of poor execution and fatigue.

“It wasn’t just the two goals, we made errors and gave opportunities which should have been punished before that.”

  • Re-live England’s Nations League semi-final with the Netherlands
  • Extra-time errors cost England as Dutch head to final
  • Two mistakes, 2.96 out of 10 – Stones comes bottom of player rater

Stones and Barkley both gifted the Netherlands possession deep inside their own half and Southgate says his players can usually make those passes “no problem”.

“Ross had gone down with cramp moments before [the third goal] and the Dutch pressed very well with a real intensity,” he added.

“[We must] play out better, the last one there’s an element of fatigue and when you are fatigued errors happen.

“We were not quite as sharp on some of the decision-making but I think it’s a really important game for us to reflect on, and the next few days will be painful having got to this stage.”

England appeared to have taken the lead with five minutes remaining as Jesse Lingard beat Jasper Cillessen with a calm finish, but the goal was ruled out after the Manchester United forward was ruled offside following a VAR review, a decision Southgate described as “deflating”.

‘We were inches away’

England captain Harry Kane was introduced off the bench in the second half, after his involvement in last week’s Champions League final, and the Tottenham striker says his side will take the defeat “on the chin”.

“We scored what we thought was going to be the winner but that’s the fine margins in games like this,” Kane told Sky Sports. “It’s part of learning as a team, we take that on the chin and that’s the way we want to play.

“That’s what VAR is there for. It’s hard because you think you’ve won but we’ve got to get used to it. I’m sure they got it right.

“I don’t think the Champions League final affected it tonight, as a squad we are good enough whoever plays and we were a few inches away from winning it.”

Raheem Sterling, who won his 50th cap as captain in Kane’s absence from the start, said the Three Lions were “punished” for their “silly mistakes”.

“We made a few mistakes and I thought we tried to play at times but it didn’t work,” he told Sky Sports. “We have still made progress to get to this stage but it is about kicking on and making that last step now.”

In a game of mistakes, highly-rated Ajax teenager Matthijs de Ligt conceded a first-half penalty after bringing down Marcus Rashford once the Manchester United had dispossessed him.

However, the Ajax centre-back recovered to bring his side level with a powerful header after losing his marker Stones at a corner.

“We all make mistakes but he [De Ligt] responded superbly – straight away he beat a player,” said Netherlands coach Ronald Koeman.

“I said nothing to him at half-time and was delighted that he scored.”

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Nick Jonas & Priyanka Chopra Would Gladly Give Up The Spotlight & Live on A Farm

Nick Jonas rocks some white jeans while leaving his hotel to a waiting car in New York City on Thursday (June 6).

Earlier in the day, the 26-year-old singer was seen with brothers Joe and Kevin, promoting their new album, Happiness Begins.

In their interview with Harper’s Bazaar, Nick confessed that he and wife Priyanka Chopra would ditch the spotlight to go and live on a farm.

“Nick still shows us listings of farms,” Joe told the glossy. “He’ll say, ‘There’s this one in Pennsylvania,’ and I’m like, ‘I don’t think that’s a good idea.’”

“The farm is very much in play. She loves the idea,” Nick shared of Priyanka‘s opinion of it.

He added though that he career is a very important part of any decision.

“I couldn’t have predicted that would happen, that life would take me down that path,” Nick says. “The fact that she’d been working in this business for as long as I have, we could relate on that. I’m grateful to have found the right person.”

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IndyCar driver James Hinchcliffe offers bribe to Kawhi Leonard to stay with Raptors

Kawhi Leonard put the Raptors on his back in leading Toronto to its first NBA Finals.  And whether or not they take down the defending champion Golden State Warriors, Raptors fans want him to stick around Toronto and sign a longterm contract in free agency this summer.

Leonard isn't exactly the most loquacious player, and even if he were, he almost certainly wouldn't be talking about his future right now in the middle of the finals with his team taking a 2-1 lead Wednesday.

But that didn't stop one Raptors fan from already offering up a bribe to the small forward. And that fan happens to be one of the most popular IndyCar Series drivers, James Hinchcliffe.

The Canadian driver is from the Toronto area, and he's joining the campaign to convince Leonard to stick around.

James Hinchcliffe, shown here at the 2019 Indianapolis 500, really wants NBA star Kawhi Leonard to stay with the Toronto Raptors. (Photo: Thomas J. Russo, USA TODAY Sports)

Via NBCSports.com:

"They started this whole campaign at home about keeping Kawhi in town," Hinchcliffe told NBCSports.com. "There are talks he might be going somewhere. That has always been our big Achilles' heel as a team. We get these talented players and they only stay for a couple years until they get picked up by a more established club.

"A lot of people are trying to keep Kawhi with the Raps. There are restaurants in Toronto promising free food for life. Free services here, there, wherever."

And what is Hinchcliffe offering the NBA All-Star?

"I was going to offer that I'll put a picture on my helmet and offer him two free passes to any IndyCar race I'm competing in for the rest of my career if he stays put."

I'm 100% serious @kawhileonard. STAY! @Raptors // #WeTheNorthhttps://t.co/8EmtI8UcaJ

Now, it's unclear how enticing those free passes are because we don't really know if Leonard actually likes racing — although he did take a ride with legend Mario Andretti a few years ago when he was still with the San Antonio Spurs. Still, that's a lot of races.

[email protected] suited up at the @IndyCar#GoProGP yesterday.

Gallery » https://t.co/k5wkWyuaYipic.twitter.com/mKrt3F18iw

But what we're really interested in here is seeing Hinchcliffe sport a helmet with Kawhi on it.

Would Leonard be a small part of it or the major focus? Would it be his face or an image of his whole body? Would he be playing basketball or staring straight into the camera or smiling or what? Would it be Raptors-themed or just Kawhi-themed?

These are important questions, but we'll only really get the answer if Leonard decides to say and takes Hinch up on his offer.

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How To Break Up With Someone You Love But Can’t Imagine Marrying

Breakups are never fun, and they can be especially hard when you don’t actually want the relationship to end. Sometimes, you get far into dating a person you’re in love with, but you just don’t see yourself staying with them forever. You want to live in the moment, but you also realize you could be wasting their time if they’d like to get married and have children and you don’t. So, I reached out to the experts for advice on how to break up with someone you love. Just because you end a relationship doesn’t mean you don’t still love the other person, and it can be particularly heart-wrenching to break things off in these circumstances.

Communicate your feelings carefully, and tell your partner why you don’t see yourself marrying them. "The most important thing you can do for them to show compassion is to explain why you love them but don’t want to marry them," Dr. Joshua Klapow, Clinical Psychologist and Host of The Kurre and Klapow Show, tells Elite Daily. "If you can answer the question for yourself then you should offer that to them." Dr. Klapow suggests being clear about what is preventing you from wanting to marry them. You should never have to lie and say it has nothing to do with them if it does, but you also don’t need to hesitate to tell your partner if you simply don’t want to get married. Explain to them everything going through your head — if you love them, consider giving them an explanation. Even if it takes a long time to tell them how you feel, try to be patient, and answer any questions they have. Clearly communicating your feelings for them can make your partner feel valued, even during a breakup.

Try to bring up the subject as soon as you know your feelings aren’t aligned. You don’t have to end a good thing early, but if you’re positive that they want to get married and you don’t, consider letting them know. "Ask yourself this: ‘why do I not want to marry them and what would make things different?’" Dr. Klapow says. "Ask yourself: ‘have I had the conversations clearly and specifically about what is not working and what is working?’ If you love the person, then you need to be very sure that you are very clear about why you don’t think it is going to work." If you’ve communicated that you don’t want to get married and they’re OK with it, then you might be able to keep seeing them. However, if you’re hiding feelings from them, it might be a sign that it’s time to check in with yourself and your relationship.

Be aware that even with open and honest communication, you’re at risk of hurting their feelings. "There is not an easy way to break up with someone you love," Dr. Klapow says. "Recognize that there is a decent chance you are going to hurt feelings." I’ve experienced relationships that went on for too long because I wanted to avoid hurting my partner’s feelings, and I regret wasting both of our time. When you enter into a relationship, you’re both tacitly acknowledging that it might end with someone getting hurt. While you don’t ever want to go out of your way to hurt the person you love, you should also be aware that leading them on in order to protect their feelings could hurt you both more in the long-run.

Additionally, try to remain open-minded to changes in the future. "Not everyone knows they want to marry someone early on," Dr. Klapow says. "The evolution of a relationship, time, and experiences can change your mind. You may not want to marry them now but the ongoing dating may actually change your experience. It’s very important to be clear with your partner about where you stand about marriage, why you don’t want to marry them now, but also what they can do to change that" If you and your partner are in love, you don’t need to end the relationship just because you’re not yet positive about marriage, but it’s important to be honest. Moreover, if you’re positive that you never want to get married one day, that’s 100% OK too. Above all, communicate your feelings and intentions as directly as possible.

Ending a relationship with someone you love can be very challenging. However, if you know you don’t want to get married to your partner, and you know your partner wants marriage, a breakup can often be the most considerate move. Using care and compassion, explain your feelings to your partner. It’s hard to do something that could potentially hurt someone you love, but if you break up with them thoughtfully, you’ll know that you made the right choice — for both of you.

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